Something Irreplaceable
by Rapunzeleyeswinchester
Summary: When Phil's bunny dies, he is devastated. The only one there to comfort him is Dan. PHAN! Warning: Extreme fluff.


Dan's POV

At about five in the evening, I was still sitting on the couch with my laptop, the same way I had been for most of the day. "Hey Phil," I said. "Look at this."

Phil leaned over, touching his head to mine to see what I had brought up on the screen. It was a picture our fans had photo-shopped of us. Our heads were on Beyonce's backup dancers, and we were wearing sparkly shorts and tanks. Phil laughed. "That's great." He said. "Our fans never cease to amaze me."

I grinned. "AmazingPhil…" I said.

Phil chuckled and hit me over the head with a pillow. "I'm going to get my totoro from the bedroom, be right back 'kay?" He started off towards his bedroom.

"Kay… and grab my phone too." Phil nodded and I turned back to my computer.

Tumblr, tumblr, tumblr, tumblr… I switched tabs to check my Facebook. Boring. I went back to tumblr and scrolled through the Sherlock tag.

A few minutes later I heard Phil's distressed cry from the bedroom. "Phil?" I called. "You okay?"

"Dan," his voice sounded small.

"Phil?" I asked again. "Are you all right?"

When he didn't answer, I put my computer on the armrest and headed towards his room. When I pushed open his door, I found him sitting on the floor by his rabbit cage. I had gotten him a rabbit last year for Christmas because he wanted one so badly. Phil was so pleased he decided to name his new pet Joey. When I asked him why, he said it was because the small brown bunny looked like a baby kangaroo. I didn't question him.

But now Phil sat next to the cage, and Joey lay limp inside. Phil looked up at me with tears in his eyes. "H-He's…. dea…dead…" he sniffed. Now, I had only seen Phil cry a few times, as he was usually so happy. But each time I did it broke my heart a little more. I reached into the cage a put a finger on the rabbit's furry back. No pulse. Phil was right, and it seemed as if our little friend was gone. I looked back down at Phil, and tears were silently streaming down his face. I knew how much he loved the thing.

"Hey, it's… it's okay…" I said sitting down beside him. Phil wiped his nose and looked down. I knew he got embarrassed when he cried, but I didn't mind it at all. "Phil, it's okay…" I tried again, but much to my disappointment he started to cry harder. Phil put his head in my lap.

"I don't want you to see me…" he said, his voice muffled from my jeans.

"Aw Phil… why not?" I asked.

"Because," came his reply. "It's embarrassing…"

I frowned. Before I could stop myself, my fingers brushed through his dark hair. Phil didn't seem to mind. "Phil you don't need to be embarrassed around me. You should know that." I told him.

I kept stroking his hair. Phil shuddered and sighed, but I could tell he was still crying. It was hard for me, knowing how hurt he was and how little I could do to help him. Phil seemed comfortable with his head in my lap though, and I had to admit, it wasn't the worst feeling in the world having him so close. In fact, I kind of liked it.

As much as I didn't want to disturb him, I thought he'd be a lot comfier on the couch. "Phil…" I said softly. "Should we go out in the sitting room now?"

Phil rolled over and looked up at me, his eyes were red and puffy and his expression still resembled glass. "Will you stay with me?" he asked, almost cautiously, as if he were afraid I'd say no.

I bit my lip and smiled, though tears welled at my eyes. "Of course," I said.

I stood up slowly and offered Phil my hand. He took it and pulled himself up, taking a deep shuddery breath, and looking back once more at the little bunny before I led him out of the room.

I sat down on the couch and Phil sat next to me, returning to his comfortable position with his head in my lap. I continued stroking his hair, not only to comfort him, but also because I liked how soft it felt.

"I feel silly." Phil said eventually.

"Why?" I asked, pulling my legs up on the couch.

Phil sighed. "Because, I'm crying… over a bunny." He snuggled further into my lap.

"Oh, Phil… You loved him, he died, and it's perfectly okay to cry about that." I reassured him.

I suddenly realized how cold it was getting with the window open. And since there was no way I was standing up to close it, I pulled the couch blanket up over Phil, tucking it under my feet.

"Thanks…" Phil muttered, tucking his own feet up further so they now touched mine.

"And look, we can get another bunny, too. I know that won't replace Joey, but it's a start right?" I asked, still stroking his hair.

Phil shrugged against me. "I suppose… but like you said, it won't replace him. Like… if you left, no one could ever, ever take your place." He shifted uncomfortably, as if this were something he had been thinking about. Suddenly, it struck me. Phil was worried I was going to leave. Maybe not now, maybe not tomorrow, but eventually, he thought I would leave him.

"Phil…" I started. "You're never going to have to worry about that. I'm never leaving."

Phil sniffed and I wondered if he had started to cry again. "Someday…" he said. "You'll want to get married. You'll want to have your own life. You're not going to want me forever Dan…"

The pain in his voice brought tears to my eyes, and I realized for the first time how much he meant to me. I wondered what it was like for him, thinking that someday I was going to leave him.

"Phil…" I said, but choked. "I will never, ever, not want you. I will want you forever. And if anyone else wants into my life, then they'll have to accept that you're a big part of it. Don't be worrying about that, okay? I'm always going to be here for you."

Phil sighed, but more relaxed this time. "Why?" he asked after a minute.

I was confused. "Why, what?"

Phil turned over and looked at me. "Why would you want me, of all people?" he asked genuinely.

I couldn't help it anymore, two tears slipped out and I quickly wiped them away with my shirt sleeve. I smiled. "Because, Phil… you're amazing."

Phil blushed and pulled the blanket over his face. "You're just saying that, I am not."

I laughed. "Yes you are. You're amazing and funny and creative, and anyone would be lucky to have you in their life. You make me smile Phil, and that's all I've ever needed."

Phil slowly pulled back the blanket, his cheeks still pink. "You… you mean that?" he asked softly.

I brushed the hair out of his eyes. "Of course I do…" I told him.

He grinned. "You're pretty amazing too." He said. "All I've ever wanted is for someone to care about me…" his smile didn't falter, but his last statement tugged at my heart.

Before I knew what I was doing, I leaned down and kissed him. His soft warm lips were still salty from tears, but I didn't care. I hadn't even considered that Phil might pull away, so I was relieved when he reached up and wrapped his skinny arms around my neck. I could feel the fresh tears coming down Phil's cheeks. I felt a shock run down my spine, and happiness spread through me quicker than a wildfire. I put my hands on either side of his face and kissed him more passionately. His fingers tangled in my freshly-washed hobbit hair.

After a minute, Phil pulled back to look at me. Despite the tears he looked giddily happy. He didn't say anything, but he closed his eyes and lied back in my lap. Under the blanket he intertwined his fingers in mine.

I stretched out my legs and scooted down so I could lay my head next to Phil's. The couch was just big enough for the two of us. "Dan?" Phil asked.

"Yes Phil?"

"I don't want another bunny." He said.

I turned to look at him. "Why not?" I asked.

"Because," he started. "All I want for Christmas this year is you."

"Aw, Phil…" I laughed.

Phil turned and buried his face in my chest and I put my arm around him. "Are you getting hungry?" I asked him.

Phil sighed into my shirt. "No. Let's stay like this, okay?"

I smiled and kissed the top of his forehead. "Sounds good to me." I said.

And so we did.


End file.
